When writing my CrosbyReports, the travel destinations themselves are of no importance. In fact, to be perfectly honest, they’re almost beside the point. They’re nothing more than a subject or topic around which to make stupid jokes. So if you’re expecting to learn something useful about travel destinations like Lisbon, the Sahara, or Tahiti, you will be sorely disappointed. My apologies.
Israel’s Masada would make an amazing Airbnb if its last occupants hadn’t trashed the place.
The Ancient Romans aren’t getting their security deposit back.
Everything you were told about Bethlehem as a kid was a lie.
Bethlehem is nothing like the place they told you about in the Bible.
Jerusalem may be popular with Christians, but Jesus probably hated the godforsaken place.
People have been returning to Jerusalem for almost 2,000 years, but why would Jesus ever go back?
The Holy Land inspired three bestselling books that have more devoted fans than Harry Potter.
Visit the only place that’s a more popular backdrop for blockbuster books than Hogwarts.
The visions people had in Jaffa were inspired by either religious fervor or a ton of opiates.
St. Peter had a vision in Jaffa that changed Christianity forever. Or was he just high?
Tel Aviv is located in the Holy Land yet, weirdly, it’s never once mentioned in the Bible.
Find out why ancient religious authors entirely passed on writing about Tel Aviv, Israel.
Positano Italy is so superficially attractive, I can’t believe it hasn’t leaked a sex tape.
Positano is the Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian of Italy’s Amalfi Coast. Good-looking, but light on substance.
Amalfi Italy was once a major port, so some lazy Italians named the entire coast after it.
At the mouth of a deep ravine, Amalfi Italy looks like it got vomited out of the surrounding mountains.
The towns along Italy’s Amalfi Coast were clearly built by human/mountain goat hybrids.
This part of central Italy is an unbelievably beautiful and incredibly stupid place to live.
Pompeii was the orgasm capital of Ancient Rome until Mt. Vesuvius came all over the place.
Like ancient Atlantis, this once-flourishing metropolis vanished suddenly without a trace. Or did it?