Positano Italy is so superficially attractive, I can’t believe it hasn’t leaked a sex tape.
Peter Crosby Positano is the Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian of Italy’s Amalfi Coast. Good-looking, but light on substance.
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europe
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Amalfi Italy was once a major port, so some lazy Italians named the entire coast after it.
At the mouth of a deep ravine, Amalfi Italy looks like it got vomited out of the surrounding mountains.
The towns along Italy’s Amalfi Coast were clearly built by human/mountain goat hybrids.
This part of central Italy is an unbelievably beautiful and incredibly stupid place to live.
Pompeii was the orgasm capital of Ancient Rome until Mt. Vesuvius came all over the place.
Like ancient Atlantis, this once-flourishing metropolis vanished suddenly without a trace. Or did it?
Naples Italy is dirty, noisy, and crowded. But the city has its downsides, too.
Naples Italy is a vibrant city that’s veritably overflowing with restaurants, shopping, gelato, and shipping containers.
The Douro Valley is Portugal’s less snooty version of Napa.
The dress code here is basically, “Just wear pants.”
No city crams in more Europe per square inch than Porto, Portugal.
Experience Europe in its most concentrated form.
You don’t have to be royalty to enjoy the Portuguese Riviera, but it helps.
Ask about our “Exiled Royal Family” discount—heirs to the throne eat free!
Belém District: Where Lisbonians go when they want to GTFO of Lisbon.
The Belém District is about as far away as you can go without leaving Lisbon.
Lisbon is the city San Francisco could’ve been if the Internet hadn’t totally effed it up.
Do you long for the old San Francisco? Well, let me tell you about Lisbon, Portugal.
Amsterdam is the (Nether)land of pot, prostitution, and polders.
Amsterdam wasn’t always a haven for patchouli-wearing, pot-smoking perverts. For a long time, the place was just a big-ass swamp.
Barcelona Spain reminds me of San Diego, only with arts and culture.
Like hot, dry weather, and tiny plates of ham? Then you’ll love Barcelona.
