Email Newsletters

Let’s talk about lawn maintenance and murder.

Look, I know you don’t want to read about lawn maintenance, and I certainly don’t want to write about it (well, not sober, anyway). So instead of boring you with ...
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How a reader’s comment inspired me to exploit my friends.

When writing this newsletter, my objective has always been to provide readers with an unsolicited and half-assed alternative to news-focused newsletters focused on the news. I saw real progress towards ...
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How I got lots of new subscribers (no seriously, I’m asking).

Recently, for reasons I can’t entirely figure out, my travel report on Belize blew up. The traffic surge resulted in a number of new CrosbyReport™ subscribers, so I’d like to ...
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The CrosbyReport™ quantum conundrum.

You’ve no doubt heard of “Schrödinger’s Cat,” the famous thought-experiment about cramming a house cat into a steel chamber along with poison and a radioactive trigger—I think it was discussed ...
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It’s the lowest price you’ll find on my free email newsletter, anywhere.

SUBSCRIBE NOW » How can I afford to discount an already free email newsletter? By slashing frivolous, unnecessary expenses. That’s right, no more doggie daycare, beer vending machine, full-size mechanical ...
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Sadly, the anole lizard situation at my home does not end well.

In one of my previous email newsletters, I wrote about how I spent most of my waking hours staring out my backyard window at “Craig,” a horny brown anole lizard ...
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Where are we going and how did we get in this hand-basket?

I think we can all agree that this year has not turned out like any of us thought, right? Who would've predicted murder hornets? Not me, certainly. I had my ...
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Corona-crisis: An unsolicited message from our CEO.

There’s chaos in the White House. Trust me, I know that we’re all living in very “challenging” and “unprecedented” times. I know this because I’ve received a thousand emails saying ...
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Greetings from Hell: My long overdue return to Florida.

They call Florida “God’s Waiting Room” because there are a lot of old people down here test-driving caskets. But for me, Florida is more like “Satan’s Boot Camp.” And here’s ...
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Media empire relocates its global operations to Florida.

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - News Wire (08/01/2019) The CrosbyReport™ media empire shutters its West Coast operations. On October 1st, 2019, the CrosbyReport™ and its subsidiaries will be closing down West ...
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Stop online companies from stealing, selling, (and leaking) your personal data.

Recently, someone said to me, “Hey, you look like a paranoid, nerdy loser. How can I stay safe on the Internet?” to which I replied, “It’s easy, Mom.” Madison would ...
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How to navigate foreign cities without annoying the foreigners who live there.

Citymapper is by far my new favorite app for travel. If nothing else, it saves me from having to constantly ask directions, butchering the local language and coming off like ...
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The best damn driving tour of San Francisco as far as you know.

Never been to San Francisco before? Never driven across the Golden Gate bridge? Never seen the Red Line to Alcatraz? Never heard the sea lions of Fisherman’s Wharf? Never watched ...
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9 smartphone travel apps you don’t need if you mostly stay home.

Got a mobile smartphone? Then congratulations, you’re not Amish or a Luddite! Well done. But are you a smart traveler? Am I qualified to make that determination just from knowing ...
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Ultimate guide to airline fees.

Airlines consider new business model: “Hey, what if we just charged for everything?”

I’m old enough to remember when airline pricing was pretty straight-forward: You bought your ticket and the price you paid included everything — drinks, food, hell, even a pillow and ...
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The legitimate money-making opportunity airlines should be all over, but aren’t.

As frequent visitors to this site know, I have a lot of beefs with the commercial airlines’ business practices. I don’t particularly like their treatment of passengers, and I find ...
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