FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: The CrosbyReport relocates its global operations to Florida.
SAN FRANCISCO, CA /News Wire/ After 23 years in the San Francisco Bay Area, the CrosbyReport is closing down its West Coast operations and moving back to Florida at the end of August. The company intends to refocus its efforts on the new core mission of relaxing, tanning, and crafting fine, travel-based entertainment.
All (both) employees will be relocated, at their own expense, to the CrosbyReport Home Office in the Tampa Bay area. Until then, the company will continue operating at full capacity out of their current Silicon Valley campus. The company wishes to thank its customers, partners, and vendors who made their 1997 expansion into the Bay Area back so successful. You will all be missed.
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Originally intended to eliminate the arduous task of writing numerous personalized correspondences to family and friends, The CrosbyReport(tm) content site has blossomed into a massive black-hole of wasted time and resources, causing its author, Peter Crosby, not merely marital strife and near-crippling financial debt, but the early stages of Carpal Tunnel Syndrome as well.