Tired of newsletters that inform or enlighten you? Try the CrosbyReport.
The CrosbyReport email newsletter puts the “super” in superfluous.
In the CrosbyReport™ newsletter, you’ll read about:
TRAVEL!
My wife drags me to places.
LIZARDS!
They’re cuter than cockroaches.
And MORE!
Frankly, I’m all over the board.
Is the CrosbyReport™ right for you?
Look, I get it—you think you don’t have time to read another newsletter. But ask yourself, “Do you ever have time to take a dump?” No, you make the time—I’m just asking you to multitask. The CrosbyReport only takes a few minutes to read, and if you’re on the toilet longer than that, you probably need to see a proctologist.
Testimonies from CrosbyReport™ subscribers.
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“Thanks for the laughs.” —Anonymous
“Brilliant, my friend. Brilliant!” —Wayne
“This is the content I needed today.” —Prescott
“There’s a typo in paragraph two.” —Daniel
Your entertainment is guaranteed.*
If you don’t find my email newsletter at least mildly amusing, let me know on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram, and I’ll sulk around for days, maybe longer—that’s my solemn promise to you.
*Guarantee not valid anywhere capable of supporting human life or lawyers.
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What are you looking at? Why are you reading this tiny type? Did you think there was some legal trickery going on down here? Did you think that, if you signed up for my newsletter, I was going to sell your email address to Russian spammers or, worse, the Girl Scouts®? Hold up, did you think I was going to trick you into agreeing to an auto warranty scam? Seriously? Wow…that’s really hurtful. You have some real trust issues, my friend. Consider professional help, because I’m very worried about you.