“Traffic Shaping” sounds innocuous enough, right? It's just an Internet Service Provider's attempt ...to control computer network traffic in order to optimize or guarantee performance, low latency, and/or bandwidth by delaying data packets.
McDonald's should be worried. And not just because of the movie "Food, Inc." No, they should be worried because there's a new device out there that could make a bigger dent in their breakfast traffic than telling people the real, nutritional content of a single Egg McMuffin. An invention so radical, you'll never again have to get up before 10:30am after a Friday night bender.
Surprisingly, the problems our country has been experiencing since the 1980s aren't the result of Republican over-spending, military build-ups, religiousity, blatant hypocrisy or rampant marital infidelity. They also aren't the result of Democratic homo-friendly amorality, Pro-Education elitism or “We know best” over-regulation. No, the reason that this once-proud, Capitalistic country is melting down can be traced directly back to one insidious evil: advertising. And I should know, after all, I work in the business.
On a lark, I took my wife out to Bing Crosby's Restaurant and Piano Lounge way the hell over in Walnut Creek. It's a grueling 40 minute trek across the bridge and into the wilds of the East Bay, but I was overcome by curiosity about this establishment that bore my surname.
(Yes, I can, albeit slowly.) First, I highly recommend that my ad friends read "What's the big idea?," by George Lois. It is a riveting look into the mind of the kind of egotistical bore we are all destined to become. Unfortunately, while his stories are fascinating, the work is miserable and very dated.